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Post by Gary on Apr 2, 2007 10:54:07 GMT -5
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Post by gridbug on Apr 2, 2007 11:36:19 GMT -5
> A man in socks and underpants is a at his worst. Lose the socks first.
Aw man... If men don't look sexy in socks, then we got nothing!
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Post by erinslion on Apr 2, 2007 12:25:54 GMT -5
>>34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
Read this carefully: Anal stimulation feels good for men because they have a prostate. Women don't.<<
Hmm. I'm sure there is a virtual army of women at their keyboards now going, "Mmmm hmm, I know that's right sister!" but I also KNOW (not THINK, KNOW) approximately two out of every ten of them are thinking, "Now hold on a damn second..."
The prostate isn't the end-all be-all of anal stimulation, therefore a woman's lack of a prostate should not preclude the possibility of enjoyable foreplay in that region. There is a pretty intense concentration of nerve endings in the area and when approaced gently and lovingly it can be a hell of a turn on for the giver and the receiver.
Man, I hate it when any one man or woman elects themselves spokesperson for the entire gender by proclaiming, "Women like this, women don't like that, men think like this" blah blah fuckity-blah.
Women (and men) are individuals with individual tastes, individual levels of body awareness, individual comfort zones and yes, individual kinks.
You may still walk in through the front door, but there isn't anything wrong (or dirty* or unpleasurable) with ringing the back porch doorbell first.)
...and there went any chance I might ever have had of dating anyone on the board.
*Unless of course it is actually, physically dirty in which case you've no business there anyway and probably ought to raise your expectations in dates a bit.
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Post by gridbug on Apr 2, 2007 12:32:10 GMT -5
Figures - look who is the expert when it comes to a$$holes...
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Post by erinslion on Apr 2, 2007 12:40:31 GMT -5
Lovely sentiment tripod, lovely sentiment indeed...
Might I suggest you take a few moments to examine your own prostate?
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Post by gridbug on Apr 2, 2007 12:47:31 GMT -5
> Might I suggest you take a few moments to examine your own prostate? I make a point to do visual inspections whenever my head is up there...
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Post by Gary on Apr 2, 2007 13:02:52 GMT -5
The thing that gets me is that all 80 of these "suggestions" can be summed up with one simple word: "communication".
If two people can't communicate what they like sexually, then they have no business having sex with each other.
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Post by gridbug on Apr 2, 2007 13:15:58 GMT -5
> If two people can't communicate what they like sexually, > then they have no business having sex with each other.
I don't know about you, but I've always had issues with proper anunciation and ball gag being mutually exclusive...
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SunnyKC
Forumite
Wolf Wrangler
Posts: 1,439
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Post by SunnyKC on Apr 2, 2007 13:19:06 GMT -5
Erinslion gets a Karma point...
Grid you ahve to wait and hour....
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Jay
Senior Forumite
Captain Cupcake
Posts: 5,070
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Post by Jay on Apr 2, 2007 17:41:59 GMT -5
13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY. Stroking her gently through her panties can be very sexy. Pulling the material up between her thighs and yanking it back and forth is not. ~Dang it........I thought women enjoyed that.... Oh well, heh
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Apr 2, 2007 19:36:15 GMT -5
> 40 Mistakes Men Make While Having Sex With Women > And in response, > 40 Mistakes Women Make While Having Sex With Men
What about the other 120 mistakes?
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RuneDeer
Senior Forumite
I look pretty young, but I'm just back-dated.
Posts: 2,937
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Post by RuneDeer on Apr 2, 2007 19:38:36 GMT -5
Somewhere along the line, someone is going to fall off of a bed, hit their head on a lighting fixture, accidentally kick a midget or trip over a goat
Hmmm...I didn't know people could see in through my windows... ;D
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Jay
Senior Forumite
Captain Cupcake
Posts: 5,070
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Post by Jay on Apr 2, 2007 20:19:04 GMT -5
RuneDeer, so, uh....where exactly in 'Churchville,' do you live?
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Bob
Global Moderator
Bird Geek
Posts: 7,029
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Post by Bob on Apr 2, 2007 20:53:17 GMT -5
They are only talking about sex with people
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Post by gridbug on Apr 2, 2007 20:57:46 GMT -5
...and goats and midgets
keep up Bob
and get your mind out of the gutter and back down in the sewer with the rest of us
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Milk
Senior Member
Sweet Brown Liquor God
Sweet Brown Liquor God
Posts: 545
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Post by Milk on Apr 2, 2007 21:35:57 GMT -5
Mmmm.... Midgets...
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Jay
Senior Forumite
Captain Cupcake
Posts: 5,070
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Post by Jay on Apr 2, 2007 21:44:17 GMT -5
And this just proves everybody loves midgets........I mean, little people
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RuneDeer
Senior Forumite
I look pretty young, but I'm just back-dated.
Posts: 2,937
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Post by RuneDeer on Apr 2, 2007 21:49:44 GMT -5
RuneDeer, so, uh....where exactly in 'Churchville,' do you live? The religious section!
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Post by voxpopuli on Apr 3, 2007 13:56:18 GMT -5
The time it took to write those adolescent diatribes, they could have actually had sex. Talk about a completely wasted effort.
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Post by gridbug on Apr 3, 2007 14:15:52 GMT -5
> The time it took to write those adolescent diatribes, they could have actually had sex LOL! A keyboard won't turn you down
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Longshot! [ Saint ]
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I'm the Broken One who Fixes It
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Post by Longshot! [ Saint ] on Apr 3, 2007 14:28:43 GMT -5
I took a nap during the first seven of the Womans Version...but when I got to the Mens, I had to take a break to stop laughing after the FIRST one.
That's some FINE WRITING there, my hoopy froods.
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Post by alphacelt on Apr 4, 2007 9:48:20 GMT -5
Hoopy froods
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Thorne
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Post by Thorne on Apr 4, 2007 18:58:08 GMT -5
Oh, I so very, very much agree with ErinsLion on this one. After reading the first ten of the men's "mistakes", I gave up, realizing that whoever came up with this list has apparently only had sex in the missionary position, every third Tuesday with a spouse.
Sorry, but after the first two and number nine (can't really argue with those), I can name at least one person who likes (and tends to prefer) the "mistakes" over the "right way" to do things.
Feh.
However, the second one is absolutely awesome, especially in it's writing. And considering that it was written by a woman makes it that much better. And it was funny as hell, too.
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Bloodhound
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Sparky
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Post by Bloodhound on Apr 4, 2007 20:32:22 GMT -5
And remember kids, doing it right the first time might mean getting to do it a second time.
Or so I hear. Whatever.
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Post by Warkitty on Apr 4, 2007 20:44:36 GMT -5
Sometimes even a third or fourth time.
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Milk
Senior Member
Sweet Brown Liquor God
Sweet Brown Liquor God
Posts: 545
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Post by Milk on Apr 4, 2007 22:11:42 GMT -5
Or... ever again...
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